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Moms vs. Zombies

Ah, motherhood. It’s a crazy time. Under all the chaos, and even when you’re trying desperately to escape them, there’s a part of you that loves those kids no matter what, and wants to protect your children from anything that might possibly ever harm them.

So what happens at the end of the world? What does a mom do in the event of a zombie apocalypse? Do they have plans in place, just in case? I asked a whole bunch of them.

One practical mom said her plan is to head to Sam’s Club, and pick up a survivalist friend along the way. I guess it would be awhile before they ran out of supplies!

After one smart mom suggested heading to Palm Springs, several more started to plan to caravan there. In their minivans, maybe? Apparently Palm Springs only has two exits/entrances, is easily defensible, and wind powered. Only problem is, that since almost all of us live in the Midwest, those gas guzzlers would probably run out of fuel before we got there.

A surprising number(at least, surprising to me since I don’t think I’ve seen a movie in three years) had seen Zombieland and said they’d prepare with cardio. Since it’s the Midwest, it’s probably not that much of a surprise that many of them chimed in “Double Tap”!

One realistic mom said “I just stubbed my toe getting out of the shower”. She was pretty resigned to being zombie food! Another said “I am very, very smart”- meaning she’d quickly become brain food”!

One movie-watching mom said “As slow as they are in the movies, I think we could probably outrun them”! I must say, it’s not the first time I’ve heard that one!

A couple of them tracked down the zombie vaccine. Children must be immunized, you know! And several uninitiated ones headed off to track down the Zombie Survival Guide and Zombieland. And ammo. Knowledge is power, you know, and you’ve got to protect the children!

A few of them noted that their four year olds have already educated them about zombies. Add my obsessed five year old to that group. Although he seems to be moving on to cryptids, the zombies keep shuffling in.

Are moms going to survive the zombie apocalypse with their children intact? Some will… and maybe now a few more than before. Unless, as one mom who reads a lot noted, they’re Brian Keene’s zombies. In which case, when the birds get infected, we’re all doomed.

My thanks to the moms from IMLM who contributed their musings. I probably won’t survive the zombie apocalypse, but I sure hope they do!

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: Dreadfully Ever After- Check it out!

Tonight, as part of the blog tour for Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: Dreadfully Ever After, we’ll be posting our review of the book. The short version- in the words of our reviewer, Sheila Shedd- “I LOVED THIS BOOK”! Read her review to find out why.

Keep your eyes open for the premiere of the book trailer for Dreadfully Ever After on March 24th. I’m told that the makers went all out and that it looks amazing.

There’s also a giveaway. Etsy artist SpecialMeat has been commissioned to create special Dreadful Antidote pendants. If you give the Dreadfully Ever After page a “like” on Facebook, you’ll have a chance to win one.

Why boycott HarperCollins?

Well, I’m late to the party with this news, but better late then never. HarperCollins has instituted a new policy of selling ebooks to libraries. After 26 checkouts, an ebook license will expire and a new license for the same book will have to be purchased. HarperCollins apparently came up with the number 26 because that would be equal to a year’s worth of two-week checkouts. Maybe in some places, books get used up and thrown out after 26 uses, but in my personal experience, unless it’s seriously damaged or out of date, I put it back together the best you can and put it back out on the shelf. The school library I worked in had a great budget for a school its size, but I could have been paying for two licenses or even three for the most popular titles, at the rate that kids checked in and out. That would have left a lot of holes in the offerings I could make, both in fiction and in nonfiction. So… there are a lot of librarians, readers, and even authors, who are vocally unhappy about this. Some are going so far as to boycott HarperCollins. This is actually quite a job, since HarperCollins owns many, many imprints.

Now, I get that publishers are in it to make money, and they see library checkouts as lost sales. With individual purchases of ebooks, you basically have one reader=one book. It’s simple to see the impact on sales. But libraries are a different matter. Libraries lend. There, you have many readers who can read the same book (which they are reading instead of buying) so publishers see those as lost sales (even though the library user might go out and buy the book afterwards if she likes it enough to want to read it 26 times).

The result of the idea that libraries get in the way of sales means that it is really difficult to get ebooks from the library. If you have a Kindle, you’re out of luck- Kindle books can’t be lent by libraries. If there’s an author you like who’s published by Macmillan- well, they don’t sell ebooks to the library market at all. It is, however, an incredibly wrongheaded idea. Libraries create and enable readers, and those are the people who are using Kindles, Nooks, and the other various ereaders out there. Nonreaders don’t use ereaders, It’s time for publishers to wake up and see that libraries are the ones creating their customers.

Libraries already face stringent budget cuts. Many are struggling for survival. This isn’t a library-friendly policy. But I question whether it’s really a good idea to boycott HarperCollins. Their imprints serve some pretty big groups of readers- romance readers, children’s books- and for a library to boycott HarperCollins (and some are even pulling print titles as well) denies something that every librarian knows is vitally important- and that’s accessibility to their community. It makes me really angry that HarperCollins is pulling this, limiting access to ebook titles , and obviously changes have to be made in the relationships major ebook publishers have with libraries (here’s a very intelligent post at EarlyWord, “Towards a New Model of Ebook Circ in Libraries”). But a library boycott is not the answer. However, you personally can make a difference by boycotting HarperCollins ebooks and by writing the CEO at HarperCollins on the behalf of libraries and ebook users (maybe you are one) with the aim of doing what we try to do here at MonsterLibrarian, which is to connect people with books, in whatever form they take.