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Book Review: Jigglyspot and the Zero Intellect by PD Alleva

Jigglyspot and the Zero Intellect by PD Alleva

Chamber Door Publishing, 2023

ISBN: 9781735168630

Available: Preorder hardcover, paperback. Kindle edition

Buy:  Bookshop.org  |  Amazon.com

 

Jigglyspot should be the runaway favorite to win “World’s Weirdest Horror Book” for 2023.  It’s a good read, but it is seriously out there: this is Clive Barker on hallucinogens.  About the only drawback is it could have used another quick edit, there are some syntax mistakes and misused commas throughout the book.

 

It’s not possible to tell much of the plot without spoiling the book, so let’s look at the starting threads.  Jiggly has a number of threads, and the chapters (which are short, each only about 4 to 6 pages) consist of the point of view for one of the main characters, written in the third person, past tense.  Surprisingly, with all the back and forth between viewpoints, it does NOT get confusing, to the credit of the author.  That’s pretty impressive, considering how all over the place the plot is.  The main characters and threads are:

  1.   Jigglyspot, a sadistic, part-warlock carnival clown who enjoys slicing and dicing annoying people with his scalpel, and is having an affair with a lady from another galaxy.  He also enjoys live extraction of hormones (this is written in graphic detail) from the skulls of people, to keep himself young.  A nice guy, he ain’t.  Jiggly makes Pennywise seem like a reasonable choice to babysit your children.
  2. Tyler, a high school student who channels his inner Charles Bronson to execute, vigilante-style, one of his classmates for unpunished crimes.
  3. Lilly, a nice suburban mom, trying to do right by her children after their dad shoots himself.
  4. Cassandra and Sharon: one a peon in a Hollywood talent agency, the other a struggling actress dreaming of the big time.  They soon split into two separate story threads.
  5. FBI agent John Mills, trying to solve a 20 year old cold case.

 

None of these seem related, for the first 200 of the 560 pages, and with the exception of Mills and Jiggly, they aren’t. It’s worth it to keep reading, because then the threads slowly draw together. Author Alleva clearly knows how to tension the plot strings at just the right time.  Even when the stories seem unrelated, it’s interesting enough that readers will want to know what happens to their favorite character next.  

 

Then the gloves come off and it all pulls together in bloody fashion.  Jiggly makes enough of a mess to keep gorehound readers happy, including sadomasochistic sex, cannibalism (complete with the marinating of people) babies killed, Satan and demons, and a bit of an interstellar tie-in.  In other words, the author threw in the kitchen sink, plus every other available appliance.  

 

With so much going on, you’d think this mess would careen off the tracks… but somehow, it doesn’t.  It’s impressive how Alleva manages to keep focused, and makes it understandable to the end.  There are a few parts that could have used a touch more explanation but that was likely the author’s choice, and not a blatant omission.   Readers will actually like and sympathize with the characters, even the not-so-nice ones.  Jiggly, scumbag that he is, does have a strange appeal, and Tyler, the schoolkid executioner, is actually one of the most likable, due to his “screw you” attitude problem, combined with an actual moral backbone.  

 

Bottom line time, folks!  Verdict is: Jigglyspot goes in many directions, yet somehow still works and is worth the read.  Recommended for fans of truly bizarro fiction that can handle some squish n’ splat.

 

Reviewed by Murray Samuelson.

Posted on August 16, 2023 by , Reply

Book Review: D.O.A. III: An Extreme Horror Anthology edited by S.C. Mendes

 

DOA Vol. 3

D.O.A. III: An Extreme Horror Anthology edited by S.C. Mendes

Blood Bound Books, 2017

ISBN: 9781940250267

Available: Paperback, Kindle edition

Buy from:   Amazon.com

 

The tagline on the back cover of the book reads: “You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll vomit.”  And, they aren’t kidding.  This is one of the most extreme collections ever published: 30 stories of raunchy, sex-driven, blood-drenched mayhem.  The stories are good, just prepare for revulsion.  This is for true hardcore lovers only– keep the kids away from this one.

 

The book’s pedigree is impressive, as Edward Lee, Jack Ketchum, Wrath James White, Bentley Little, and Richard Matheson are among the authors represented.  The stories are generally entertaining and well-written.  If there’s a theme, most of the stories involve horrible people doing horrible things to each other.  No joke: there are some VERY ugly torture sequences in this book that make Eli Roth films seem like Disney movies.   There are some stories with a paranormal bent, which helps keep the book from getting too one-dimensional.  The originality is decent, although not to the level of the Welcome to the Splat Club series.  As we’ve come to expect from Blood Bound Books, there is an undercurrent of dark humor threaded through many of the stories, which helps balance out the overall story mood. Notable stories worth mentioning include:

 

“Hostile” is only four pages, but it is comedic genius.  Jeff Strand’s hilarious twist on the Hostel movie series proves that the worst situations can be amusing, when written correctly.

 

In “Taking Root”, a virulent strain of plant spores has contaminated Earth, turning people into… plants, of a sort.  Two survivors find that, unfortunately, an apocalypse still doesn’t change peoples’ predatory instincts, or their bad nature.  Despite sounding grim, it’s a light-hearted take on doomsday writing.  Plants growing out of a person’s rear can be funny!

 

In “Ritchie”, Jackson killed Ritchie the bully when he was a kid, but Ritchie has a bad habit of coming back from the dead once a year.  So, Jackson has to kill him, again.  And again, and again.  The fun part is, Ritchie’s injuries from each death carry over year to year, and he becomes less intimidating to the point of hilarity… but Ritchie may still have a trick or two up his sleeve…

 

 It’s worth mentioning that this isn’t ‘peek under the bed and close the curtains out of fear’ horror writing.  These aren’t scary, and aren’t meant to be.  This is straight-up extreme splat writing to the max.  

 

Bottom line: if the members of Cannibal Corpse and GWAR decided to write short stories instead of lyrics, then DOA III is probably what you would get.  Recommended for hardcore fans only.

 

Reviewed by Murray Samuelson

Posted on May 15, 2023 by , Reply

Book Review: Black Planet, Vols. 1-4 by Nikki Noir

Black Planet Books 1-4 by Nikki Noir

Black Planet, Books 1-4, by Nikki Noir

Blood Bound Books, 2020

ISBN: 9798675368907

Available: paperback, Kindle edition ( Amazon.com )

 

With her short stories, author Nikki Noir has carved out a place for herself in the world of spleaze (that’s ‘splat and sleaze’) writing.  Black Planet was previously released electronically as four separate sections, now all combined into one paperback book.  It’s a decent effort, with the first two ‘setup’ sections being the best parts.  The third section, which carries the bulk of the story’s motion, is a bit of a letdown, with too many of the essential plot details held back.  Still, the first two sections help make up for the third.  The fourth section is basically just a lead-in to whatever comes next, as according to the author, there will be more.

 

The first section sets up the story beautifully, replete with the author’s usual trashy intensity.  Two teens eking out a living by doing sleazy online fetish films have the good fortune of a relative dying, thus giving them a dead body to use in their videos.  They hook up with a girl who is into the occult and crazier than they are. That concludes the excellent first section, and no question, it’s the best one.  Section 2 is a different thread but still setting the story up, and it’s almost as good as the first section.  This time it involves teen girl Haley, her younger brother, and weird mechanical owls in the woods.  There’s also a shade of what’s to come, with the introduction of the shadowy organization Stillwater.  

 

Where the first two parts ran at high speed, you’d expect the overdrive gear to kick in for the third section, where the plot threads start to tie together.  But, this section feels more like it’s stuck in neutral.  The author’s trademark freaky sex and messy murders are there, the writing is fine… it just doesn’t have the same sense of urgency as the first two sections.  Part of the problem is almost none of the “why” part is given in this section, and it would have been the perfect time to do it.  The organization called Stillwater keeps lurking in the background, but its presence is given very little time, or explanation.  To keep readers interested, an author have to give them something in the book for a bit of the ‘why’ things are happening.  Otherwise, it seems more like a linear sequence of events that happen for no real purpose, and it’s frustrating.  It’s playing the plot cards too close to the vest for a bit too long, you gotta throw a few cards on the table to keep the game going.  The storyline is good, it just needs to be less of a mystery.   

 

There’s some definite fun to be had with reading Black Planet, it just could have used a few tweaks to help keep reader interest higher.  Hopefully, the next sections will reveal more to the readers in terms of the overall plot.   

 

Reviewed by Murray Samuelson.

Posted on April 25, 2023 by , Reply
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