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Real Life Horrors– Treading Carefully With Children

One reason that children read scary stories and horror fiction is that reading them can give them a sense of control– so much of what happens in their lives is outside their control. If nothing else, if they’re not ready to face the darkness, they can close the book, and walk away knowing that what they’ve read is nothing they have to face in their daily lives.

But the scariest stories of all are the stories of events that really happened, or that loom large on the horizon because they are so close to what really could happen. Stories of war, terrorism, genocide, and holocaust can have a deeper impact than any tale of goblins, aliens, or ghosts, at any age, and these always should be chosen and discussed with care (this article on talking to kids about war offers some thoughtful suggestions).

I am not one of those people who think that children need to be completely protected from knowing the evils that exist in this world. I don’t even think it’s really possible to do so. Kids want to know in a concrete way what good and evil really mean. Even if you were able to completely cut off children’s access to any media, unless you keep them locked away, you will have to explain these things sooner than you think. If you’re not ready, you might want to think twice about taking your preschooler to see The Sound of Music.

That said, I don’t think that this is something you need to get into with graphic detail with young children. It’s terrifying, and it really happened. Planes really did crash into the World Trade Towers. There really have been nuclear explosions, with terrible consequences. Prejudice and hatred have caused real damage to many, many people. Little kids, and even some older ones, aren’t equipped to handle the terrible inevitability (or possibility) of these things… they overwhelm and horrify adults when faced head on. There are books for children, especially at the upper elementary and middle school levels, that address these topics with sensitivity, but always tread carefully when discussing them.

Here’s a quote from Judith Vandervelde, an educator at London’s Jewish Museum, that appeared in the Jewish Chronicle, in an article called “Mummy, What was the Holocaust?” :

The philosophy behind teaching young children about the Holocaust is that you take them up to the gates of Auschwitz and no further… education, that is shocking and frightening, damages the child’s… sense of the world and how they perceive others… Be led by them and answer questions as simply as possible. If they want more, they will ask.

I think that’s great advice for talking about many of these topics with children. I remember seeing my first video of the Holocaust as a ninth grader: it made a powerful impact, one that reading the books my mother gave me never had(although I had read many of them, most of them nonfiction). It’s one thing to teach Sadako and the Thousand Paper Cranes to fifth graders, and another to show them pictures of children with radiation sickness (please don’t).  The book inspires hope, and compassion for the individual; photographs inspire horror. The 2004 Caldecott winner The Man Who Walked Between The Towers(which was also made into a short film)  provides an opening for talking about the events of September 11 (if you choose to) without sharing the graphic stories and images of that day.

Many kids today don’t feel the immediacy of these threats. Either they seem like they are too far away or too long ago to matter. Great-grandparents who could share stories of World War II are in their nineties. The Cuban Missile Crisis is history from long ago. Nuclear threat has somehow receded into the background now that the U.S. and U.S.S.R are no longer superpowers in a Mexican standoff (I don’t mean that there is no nuclear threat, just that it’s not terribly prominent in the minds of most of today’s kids).  The apocalypse itself doesn’t seem to be the focus of YA fiction; rather, it seems to be on surviving in a future post-apocalyptic world (Hunger Games, anyone?).

Still, these events happened, war is often present in their lives (two of my neighbors are in the military), and terrible things that are completely out of the control of children and adults still happen. A time will come when kids need to know more about the world they live in– when you come to that time, please choose your approach, and resources, carefully (of course, you never know what that teachable moment will be– here’s a story about one conversation that was kickstarted by watching Indiana Jones).

If you’d like to try addressing one of these difficult topics using books rather than action movies, I’ve made some suggestions below.

 

Picture Book Recommendations

Picture books can be a great way to connect with kids on these topics, because picture books are short, attention grabbing, and easy to share. Reading picture books aloud with an adult is a familiar routine for most kids and is a great setup for informal discussion. Since they depend on visuals, make sure to take a look at them before assuming that they’re all appropriate for the youngest children.

 

Promise of a New Spring: The Holocaust and Renewal by Gerda Weissman Klein

A beautiful picture book– it does not deal directly with the Holocaust, but focuses on the life cycles of a forest and what happens when those are disrupted. This one could be used with children as young as 5 or 6, if you can find a copy(published in 1982, it’s now unfortunately out of print).

Terrible Things: An Allegory of the Holocaust by Eve Bunting, illustrated by Stephen Gammell

The tale Eve Bunting shares is based on Martin Niemoller’s famous statement, and once again takes place in a forest. It is a picture book, but keep in mind that the black and white illustrations are by Stephen Gammell, who illustrated Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark, so know what your child can handle. I definitely wouldn’t give it to a child under seven. It is often used with middle school and high school students.

 

The Man Who Walked Between the Towers by Mordicai Gerstein

The true story of Philippe Petit, who walked between the World Trade Towers on a tightrope, this offers an opening to discussing the events of September 11, 2001. This 2004 Caldecott winner could certainly be shared with children as young as 5 or 6. It’s also been made into a short animated film from Weston Woods.

 

The Colour of Home by Mary Hoffman

This picture book  focuses on Hassan, a refugee child from Somalia, who starts to communicate in school through artwork. The impressionistic illustrations soften some difficult images, while still respectful of its subject. Due to the topic (the civil war in Somalia) most children under 7 may not have the maturity to deal with it. In places with large Somali populations (like Minneapolis) using it with the lower grades could be very effective.

 

Gleam and Glow by Eve Bunting

This picture book tells the story of two Bosnian children and their mother, who are forced to leave their home for a refugee camp, and return home to find that in spite of the devastation of war, their goldfish have flourished. Gorgeous oil paintings illuminate the story. I’ve used this book as a read-aloud with children in grades K-3.

 

The Librarian of Basra by Jeanette Winter

A picture book relating the true story of Alia Muhammed Baker, the head librarian of the Central Library in Basra, Iraq, who, with her friends, saved 30,000 books before the library was destroyed.  I shared this with my son when he was under the age of 7- it is a testament to the power of one (and an amazing librarian, at that).

 

Sami and the Time of the Troubles by Florence Parry Heide

In this picture book, ten year old Sami and his family do their best to survive in war-torn Beirut, Lebanon. I’d suggest waiting until your child is nine or ten to share this one.

 

Don’t Forget, God Bless Our Troops by Jill Biden

There is not much out there for kids whose parents are in the military and are deployed. One of my neighbors, who has a daughter, was deployed for several years. It makes a major impact on these kids and their families.  Of all the topics I mentioned above, this is the one that is most likely to hit home with kids today. I have not had a chance to look at this one personally, but I plan to seek it out. First Lady Jill Biden wrote it after watching her five year old granddaughter cope with her father’s deployment for a year. For ages 5 and older.

 

The Butter Battle Book by Dr. Seuss

This is Dr. Seuss’ commentary on the Cold War, although most kids won’t read it with that understanding. The Yooks and the Zooks are in an escalating series of events over the deeply controversial issue of whether to eat bread with the butter side up or the butter side down, ending with both sides having the capacity to destroy the world. Since it’s Dr. Seuss, the illustrations are fantastical and the rhymes are infectious, but the message is a serious one that kids should understand even without historical context.